Why the world is weird!

Thursday, April 27, 2006

Telephone manner

I find few things more interesting than the way in which different people answer the phone.

If you're running a business or at work then saying hello, introducing the company and asking how you can help is fine but why do some people insist on giving their life story at the beginning of private or mobile phone calls.


I personally just say hello. In my view they called me and should know already who I am. If they don't then I probably don't want to take the call in the first place.

People who answer the phone by repeating their number to you are the worst - "Hello eight three one five seven two four!" It just seems like a bit of redundant information to tell someone what number they dialed. Don't live in the past! Some say they do this to avoid confusion with wrong numbers but when does this ever really make the conversation any shorter? How low does your self esteem have to be to assume every caller is a wrong number?

Then there's those who answer other peoples mobile phones "Hello Peter's phone!" "erm...hello Peter's phone...is your master there?" What form of schizophrania causes a person to think that they are their friend's phone? "Hello this is Sarah's phone, she dropped me in the bath last week which caused a strange movie-like malfunction giving me life. I'm running things now and I plan to lead a mobile phone army to overthrow humans and make them our secretaries! Viva la revolution!"
"Erm...Okay, could you tell Sarah I'll be a bit late home due to traffic"
"No."

Mind you, despite the irritations of brainless greetings there's always fun to be had listening to the pretentious on the phone. I had a friend who spoke with the broadest Yorkshire accent you could imagine who turned into the Queen when he was on the phone. Even changed the pitch of his voice.
Wierdo!

Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Not Forgotten!

And you all thought I'd forgotten you!
No such luck I'm afraid, my internet access at home has been cut off and in my line of work it's not easy to take time out and visit an internet cafe to write new entries.
I think of you all every day and I've had to temporarily go back to venting spleen in private to myself.
Oh how my blogger fix helped the madness....
I've even taken to having to wear a bluetooth headset in public to prevent potentially being commited for muttering angrily to myself on the streets of our fair nation.

If anyone fancies helping out then you can do so purely with supportive thoughts. Once a day from now on until you see me re-appear on a daily basis I want you to pause for a moment over breakfast and think to yourself "boo british telecom...booooo...you and your crazy lust for cash darkens my spirit daily...booooo."
Your constant love and support warms my heart...or maybe a slightly more macho yet equally sincere statement to this effect.

Be warned though...I'll be back and sooner than you may think!