The Bread Debate

I've thought long and hard about how I'm going to explain this one and haven't really found a concise way.
The best way to understand just how long and how heated this debate can become you need one person from Derbyshire, one from Yorkshire, one from Leicestershire and one who speaks "proper" english (ie someone posh or someone who learnt english as a foreign language).
Then all you need to do is ask the following questions out load and sit back...
What on earth is a barmcake?
What's a cob?
Doesn't a teacake have to have currents in it?
Which fool came up with the term breadcake? Is it bread or cake?
Trust me, try it! You'll be amazed!