...Another dollar.

I love the adverts for these diet drinks. The diet drinks which can help slimming or wieght control as part of a balanced diet. So people start using these products and change their diets at the same time and attribute the benefits purely to the drink.
So Mr. Fattychops, was it the health shake that helped you lose wieght or was it cutting out your daily twelve cheeseburgers?
hmmmm. Lets think.
What too few people realise is that if you're an active person you don't have to starve yourself to lose wieght. Have a little bit of everything (yes everything) and be active for as much of the day as you can.

Another day...

Why on earth are more and more people in this country succoming to what I like to call "antipodian inflection disorder". It's the increasing habit, especially in teenagers, to use an upward inflection to the end of every sentence they say as though everything's a question.
I've started to answer every question and I've found it makes the point very well. For Example...
Friend "I was walking?"
Me "Yes, I know what walking is."
F "To my car?"
M "Yes, I also know what a car is."
F "and I saw this guy?"
M "I know what a guy is too."
F "and he asked me what time it was?"
M "What are you asking me?"
F "Sorry am I doing it again?"
M "You're not bloody Australian! Stop watching neighbours and GET SOME WORK DONE!!"
If you know someone suffering from antipodean inflection disorder then give them a sturdy slap...in public...or ridicule them heavily.
Their lives will become richer and they will thank you for it in the end.

Go on then

I've put one clip together, this is the first part of mondays show when I first handed over to the meeting room. Let me know what you think by clicking on comments at the bottom of the page.
Click here to hear the clip!

Sorry miss...i forgot my homework

Hi all. Sorry I know I promised some snippets of my short stint on the airearlier this week but I downloaded a free trial of some very nice editing software and spent most of today proving to myself how rubbish I am at trying to make remixes.
I will be putting a couple of clips on here soon but I was overtaken by the sunday time frittering monster! You know the one. It's the beast that urges pensioners into their cars despite the fact that they don't want to go anywhere. The one that makes you watch the Eastenders omnibus. I'd call it the patron saint of window shoppers.
I even procrastinated over my coffee this morning. I made it at quarter past nine and finished it at twenty to three. Yes, it was cold but in this job you get used to drinking cold tea and coffee.
I did trim my hair though so at least that was constructive. Hair clippers from Tesco - £8. I've just used it for the second time and so it's paid for itself!

Fear and Loathing in West Yorkshire

I've decided that I'm going to go back to being a bit more dedicated to this blog and I'll be making posts every day again.
Work's changed around a bit and I'm actually genuinely enjoying it now. The only main problem with that is that I'm dedicating almost all of my time to it. I suppose that at the moment with not having a girlfriend or family, I'm not trading away my time from anything important.
I've noticed that the surrounding areas of bradford become a complete modern urban cliche on a Saturday evening. Every off-licence I've driven past this evening has had a bevvy of hoodies loitering around it. Drivers of heavily modified cars are bombing around trying to grab the badly needed attention they crave and taxi drivers are trying their hardest to secure that inevitable personal injury claim. I don't think they really understand the reality of the phrase "where there's blame, there's a claim". The idea is that someone else is to blame!
Let's hope that's cleared that one up.
Well I'm looking forward to my lie-in tomorrow. I don't have to work but there are a few people I could call on so I might have a wander out in the afternoon. The more I do, the more I stand to make so why not? Not that I'm a materialist. No more than anyone else with monthly payments to make anyway.
Well I'm off. Back tomorrow, I promise.

been busy an' stuff

Hi folks, I know I missed yesterday but I've been really busy at work.
I've downloaded the logs of the two hustings shows and I've been listening back to them. Monday was obviously a bit more fun than tuesday but there are some pretty nice bits (at some points I actually sound quite professional!) I'll edit the good bits together and put a link on a post in the near future so you can let me know what you think.
Many people think that business is a bit of a cut-throat environment to really work in. I suppose that the only images they see are in tv shows like the apprentice. The innacuracy in the apprentice is that every person on that show is out for themselves only rather than together to achieve a common goal. If someone on the apprentice struggles, the others will let them to ensure that there's someone to blame if everything goes to pot. When you're really on a team you know that the bottom line is one out, all out. If one does well then all do well. If one fails, it affects everyone. This means that when anyone struggles they get the best possible support and are lifted by that. Modern business is cut-throat when it comes to "Us and them" but if you get the "us" part right then "they" don't stand a chance.

All done

Just got home after the second day of bradford uni student's union's hustings coverage.
I was good to get back into the studio but I'm glad I'm done now. If anyone listened in then thanks! If you couldn't or didn't get the chance then I'll be going back to the production studio on sunday to edit together some of the best bits and I'll put a link on sunday's post so keep an eye out for that.
My trivia blog has been pretty quiet recently so please show your support by clicking on the link just to the right here. Daily trivia, you just might learn something.

Limbering up..

Home fromwork nice and early to feed myself up and get ready for my comeback to broadcasting and I'm really starting to get a bit excited about it.
Great day at work today. It's a shame that other companies don't seem to realise that workers are alway more effective when they're happy and being paid properly. I mean, as much as pay levels have to reflect the importance and skill involved in a job but fair pay for all is a must. That's the problem with too many large, powerful companies. They're always trying to find ways to pay you less and less.
Anyway, my pizza's nearly ready so I'd best sign off. Wish me luck...

Ug...Fire!

Another reason I'm pleased about the snow is that it makes it difficult to have a bonfire!
Might seem like a bit of a strange thing to say but all day yesterday some neighbours of mine a few doors down were enjoying a lovely acrid bonfire.
What is it about some people that causes them to revert back to neanderthals whenever there's a controlled fire involved? I'm sure that the fire was started for a perfectly adequate reason such as safe disposal of sensitive documentation, for example, but after a couple of hours it had descended into madness. Grunting blokes wandering around the local area looking for anything to keep the fire going, knuckles scraping the ground. Not a word of a lie, at one point I drove past and saw a fully grown man, halfway up a tree, jumping on a branch in a worryingly simian manner to dislodge it. I could swear that as I drove past the same gentleman he paused to watch me in sheer amazement as I floated by in my shiny magic horseless carriage.
The strange thing was that the fire was ilegally close to the main road which to my mind explained the presence of a police car which I had assumed was there to tell the apes to put the fire out. This theory was however shattered upon my return home a couple of hours later as the fire still burned and the police car was still there. I had an image in my mind of two male police officers scrabbling around somewhere nearby hunting for kindling, overcome by the primeval influence of the flames.
In a way it's nice to have this form of modern day proof that creationist theory is rediculous but you'd hope these lapses would become a little more rare in 2006.

More Snow

It's always a pleasant surprise to open your curtains and see a scene like this...

It does mean that I'll be walking to the local shop in the snow to pick up my daily groceries but I actually don't mind that so much.
I could take a quick drive out but there's no real point. I mean, I'm confident in my ability to drive carefully in the snow but I see more stupid driving in this city than anywhere else so I'm not willing to take that chance. Plus I can't really be arsed to clear the snow off the car.

Well I'm going to be back on the radio tomorrow and tuesday night live. As I've said before, my main involvement will be at the beginning of easch show from 6pm. I'll be keeping things ticking over until the folks are ready to start. If you want to listen, you'll need to use winamp but you can download the free version from here. And once you've installed it go to the Ramair website by clicking here then click the listen live link.

More Audience participation...

C'mon folks, it's the weekend and we'd all love to hear ways in which you find the world wierd. Send me your pet hates, irritations or vent your bewilderment here. Remember that a problem shared can be a source of amusement for the masses!
If you have been affected by any of the issues raised in this blog then award yourself some sweet therapy by telling everyone about it.
This isn't Doctor Frasier Crane but I am listening.

P.S. Last time I asked for people to post things, no-one did and it made me cry.
Have a heart!

Leisure Time

I've come to realise that leisure time makes no sense. I started the day looking forward to a nice relaxing weekend of doing nothing but after an hour or so of rubbish tv I'm bored and trying to think of something to do.
The problem is that when you're trying to think of something to pass the time the only thing that you can think of is work. I need to do my ironing, tidy my flat, take out the rubbish, wash the car, hoover out the car, wash my towels, clean the oven...
you know what? Thinking about all that has made me tired.
I wonder what's on tv...

I suspect Vowel play.

What is happening to the English language? I don't want to sound like an old fart but Chat rooms and text messaging is killing off the humble vowel!
When exactly is l8er?
Who are u?
y?
Who knows...

Suits_by_Matalan

Strange title for this one I know.
I nipped into my local matalan this afternoon to pick up a couple of items of clothing (we like it on the cheap don't we folks!?). The girl behind the counter was gorgeous, early to mid twenties I'd say. She said she was a medium (not clothing size) and explained to me that she finds it hard when trying to meet men because she knows something about them before she speaks to them, then she said she knows something about me! The strange thing is that I didn't ask her what and now I wish I had. Ah well, maybe next time.
On another note, I'm off to halifax tonight for a few drinks with a mate of mine. Should be good fun. Sometimes I do go out on a Thursday night. Places are a little less crowded than on a weekend and in my line of work it's usually better to be a bit more compos mentis at the weekends.
Predictive text revealed another interesting word comparison yesterday. We all know that if you try to type the word "pint" you get "riot" but I discovered if you try to type "smirnoff" ( as in the vodka) you get "poisoned". Interesting...

Don't Panic!

Yes you are in the right place! As you can see I've decided on the new name for my blog. It does exactly what it says on the tin and to boot there's a nod towards this internetty venture with a bit of alliteration, (ie the three W's - we wuv the world wide web).
Does this new title work? Feel free to comment, I can take criticism!

A five minute reprieve...

Well things are all change at work so the last couple of days have been really busy.
Thanks, by the way, to the reader who left the comment for me today. It was very nice, thank you.
Crikey, I can't believe I used the word "nice". It's such a non-compliment ("thanks for the jumper it's really...nice", "no honestly, I loved the pinapple omlette! It was very...nice"). It's like using the words "different" or "interesting". The sort of words you normally use when you don't really mean it.
Well this isn't one of those instances, I genuinely appreciated the comment.
Mind you I'd rather thank people who leave comments by name, you don't have to be a blogspot member to put a name on your comment. Makes things more friendly I reckon.

Incidentally I did eventually catch up with my brain yesterday. It said it had been away on an impromptu business trip but I don't trust it. If I wasn't the one supplying the coffee I'm sure it'd be off somewhere else.
Anyway I'm off now to update my trivia blog too. My brains come up with a dastardly plan to make it look like I didn't miss any days out.
Cunning!

Autopilot

Sunday morning and my brains decided to take the day off. I reckon I get the rough end of the deal in the relationship between me and my brain. It remembers only what it wants to, every now and then it drops me in it and like today it takes time off without even letting me know! I mean, what sense is there when I can remember my 16 digit driving license number but not my 4 digit pin? Why do I remember the registration number of every car I've had but never remember to buy toilet roll when I need it?
When my brain gets back off it's little holiday I'll ask it but it'll probably just give me a flippant excuse.

Regaining celebrity

I returned to the radio studio today! It was the production studio rather than the live studio but it's the first step towards my two day return to the airwaves.
Bradford uni's students union is having it's elections soon and the student radio station ramair have invited me to return to present the live coverage of the hustings a week on monday and tuesday from 6.
There's a link to the ramair website on the right of the page, if you want you'll be able to listen to the program on-line. My main part of the shows will be at the beginning introducing the show and I'll be butting in with questions from time to time.
It'll be a bit strange being back on the air but I'm looking forward to it.

Blizzards!!

Well, swathes of West Yorkshire were covered in a thick blanket of snow in a very short space of time this afternoon. Mind you on the bright side, my google weather report says that it was sunny all day today and will be a bit cloudy over the weekend. So that's nice!

One good thing though is that I fought my way through the snow to tesco's to find the car park all but empty. Now that's a shopping marvel! The decline of the local store with real character is a shame but there's nothing like being one of very few shoppers in a huge magastore!

Well it's all change here and things are looking good but, as they say, the proof of the pudding's in the eating.

!!Audience Participation Required!!
I'm planning on renaming the blog, I'm looking for something a bit shorter, catchy and witty. Everyone reading this should post a suggestion via the comments link at the bottom of this post. All suggestions will be considered!

Confusion

Don't you find it embarrasing when you walk into a room and forget what you went in for?
Especially when it's a toilet....or the car.
I'm not forgetful, my brains just busy doing something important....one day it'll tell me what that is.

That Bl**dy Apprentice Candidate...

Why can't Alan Suger get rid of Jo, the overemotional wreck from the Apprentice? If she gets through one edition without crying I'll give her a biscuit.
And...will someone tell Syed that it's not the 80's any more?

Feel it in my water meter.

So the government are imposing compulsory water meters on people. Well it reduced water consumption by 11% when they did it in the 80's so maybe it'll be a good thing just as long as they adjust the rates fairly and make a bit more effort into plugging up the leaks in the streets.